My friend Sue (of the cock infamy) just rang to tell me about her weekend. She had a date with this new guy and they were having drinks canoodling at a popular hideaway near Athi River early Saturday evening. A small world away everything was going well, the mano was giving her the look that means today is today not tomorrow and making her feel all tingly from the back of her knees to her ears. Sue knew the deal was signed, sealed, delivered she was his but the spell was broken when a scraggy woman claiming to be wifey showed up in a gaggle of 3 other angrier females. Sue describes the wife as looking like a little rat with a tattered sack for a weave.
Anyway seems the guy didn’t have the balls to go with the promised cock he was meekly dragged away by the wife however not before downing his three-quarter Pilsner which Sue ended up paying for; in consolation at least she got a refund for the room. There was no biting or scratching or even spitting just some bone-breaking name-calling and credit to baba-watoto (baby-father) he managed to mouth ‘I’ll call you’ to a mortified Sue. All very civilised. Sad bit is that when shocked Sue went home to her flat, the electricity was out so she had a cold bath, brushed her teeth and lay alone in her darkened bedroom shivering in bed feeling humiliated and sorry for herself.
After all that her date called the next day to ask Sue if she was free and could he come over. His story is the other woman was an ex who’s a bit demented. Yeah right and they are all innocent in prison, la la la la la I’m not listening to you. Sue just said better you stay with your crazy ex if you come near me again I’ll cut your balls off.
Aaargh men!
haha! [and I'm not laughing at Sue]. That was a very interesting read.
ReplyDeleteI wonder how the ex knew where to find baba watoto. Looks like that Athi River joint is a regular pit-stop for him. Perhaps Ms. Ex had been in Sue's chair before.
Hi Mwistar
ReplyDeleteKwani si yu know sato is plot viewing day? Sa the guy pangiad the wife that ka plot but she juad something was up when he wore his boots and tha ka stetson. Jamaa si playa! xxx
You mean the lady went after the hubby mpaka to the joint, she is a staaaalker!!! Sue should better cut his balls off when he says he is coming for some. He should get none...
ReplyDeleteOh my God...it´s sometimes not easy being a homosensualist from afar...I must remind myself(ishness/obsessedness) that I´m here to make new friends and learn new stuff (but I will share with you the married studs strut their off duty stuff and we have Gallos crowing here too...as it turns out the favorite Beer is named Gallo)...on Fridays they are called ¨escapistas¨ (that´s because these dudes escape, not to be discovered by the señora).
ReplyDeleteHi Haute Haiku,
ReplyDeleteI don't advocate for violence hence the balls-cutting is a little extreme. Perhaps I'd advice to grab the scrotum and give it a sharp twist and pull...lol! xxx
Hi Leonardo,
Pity but the fate of the abandoned wife transcends all cultures and other standing. It may just be the way guys are wired. xxx
waaah, drama. Yaani chillez are still pelekwad sides of Mlolongo? Ah, I dont get it!!....love the loose transalation,"baba-watoto (baby-father)".....and if you want to kamata some si you do your homework well bana? Clearly she picked someone who has no standards,(judging from the scraggy appearance of said wife/ex)
ReplyDeleteWhat she doing with spent forces. In her situation let her go for a young stallion with no attachments.
ReplyDeleteHi Rox,
ReplyDeleteMlolongo ndio kupoa, kuna nyama ya mbuzi kutoka kitengela na pocket-friendly kejas! (I can feel the fakeness in my typing those words, lol!!!) Problem with some ngals & mboiz just like chuo they don't do homework so they fail miserably. xxx
Hi Shiko-Msa,
Needs must. When the itch strikes some people can behave in an irrational way. Sue told me it's a good thing she'd deleted ex boyfriends number she felt so vulnerable she'd have called him. Now that's a low point. xxx