Wednesday, February 25, 2009

The gay man's sport

Last night’s Man U-Inter match was a very dull affair. A little like my insipid love life at the moment. I watched the game at a friend’s house, through three Imara-kama-Simbas and a fine dish of Ugali with beef stew. I woke this morning to the sound of roaring lions in my head which I blame on the Pilsners; I am sticking to Tusker from now on.

Pretty-faced Ronaldo is ok but best player on and off the pitch has to be man’s-man Giggs who seems to be having a renaissance – I feel like I’m due a renaissance myself. For a gay man like me, watching footie is all about checking out who looks hot and who’s not so hot.

If I were a manager picking a fantasy team for the premier league of a very different kind of sport…hmmm...my tag-team would definitely feature Giggs. I also wouldn’t complain about a tackle from Ashley Cole and neither would I bring myself to kick Theo Walcott out of bed. I’m not a Ronaldo hater but his delicate looks don't score with me. I find him too ‘trophy-wifey’ for my liking. And if I worked in the locker-room then Lampard should definitely have an early bath every day! (I couldn't resist the puns, sorry).

You can say I have a deep and thorough understanding of the sport.

3 comments:

  1. Yes i can empasise (although not spell) with that though ronaldo trophy wife as you see him, looks more like an innocent to me, and i just like tainting the innocent

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  2. Hi Spyke,

    "and i just like tainting the innocent" if I knew you I'd say you had the morals of an alley cat..lol...naughty

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  3. unfortunatly not, i can talk the talk but in the end, i just toe the line im afraid. i respect people to much, dont get me wrong if given the oppurtunity it is certainly an offer i wouldn't immediatly decline. but i think to highly of people. still i do love to taint people, however i just need to wait for people to want to be tainted. but then it doesn't really count.

    Spyke X

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Hey you, leave a comment but don't just be an asshole about it - try to be decent. That said you are welcome to heap abuse or ridicule if it makes you feel better. However in order to get published it must not be homophobic, racist or sexist. OK?