Homophobic best friend invites us to lunch

My best friend Mike called me today. We haven’t seen each other much lately. It hasn’t escaped my attention that since George came into my life I’ve been purposely neglecting Mike. I’ve known Mike for years; we were room mates in college and I still bear the emotional scars of my secret unrequited nightly lust. Then Mike was the perfect man I knew my family prayed I would become and for many years I tried but failed to become that other man.

Mike has invited me to his house tomorrow afternoon for some nyama choma with beers, that seemingly benign social activity enjoyed and frequently abused by many Kenyans. I instinctively said yes before remembering that I now come as part of a unit that must include George, so I said to Mike I’ll bring a friend. I could hear the raised eyebrow of disbelief in his voice when he joked ‘eh you found yourself a girlfriend, bring her along and if she’s hot then we can compare notes ha ha ha,’ not harmless under different circumstances especially coming from this philandering married man. I told him no it’s a dear friend called George that I want you to meet and he breathed disappointedly oh, bring him along.

George is looking forward to meeting Mike and his family. He understands how important they are to me so George says it’s a small but crucial step we should take for the sake of expanding our joint social circle. I agree but I’m also anxious about tomorrow because Mike is a vocal homophobe from whose acidic scrutiny I want to shield my lover George.

Blast from the past

Can you imagine turning up at Carnie dressed like this? I think the music is good though. Enjoy..

Indecent Proposals - Should I?

A rather strange email landed in my inbox yesterday. AR obviously wants to turn my life into an experiment or a circus depends which way you look at it. Let me explain: the email contained two intriguing proposals. Both are fraught with unpredictability, one is even downright reckless and dangerous to me. Anyway here is what this reader is asking me to consider:

Proposal A – To charm a woman stranger in a bar or nightclub for a night and then come out to her as gay. Aim is to see whether I can pass for a straight man for an evening. Apparently my writing sounds queer, so I must be as camp as a row of tents.

Proposal B – To publish my own picture here on this blog. Aim is to dispel the myth of the non-existent gay Kenyan.

I was a little unsettled when I read this and mildly offended as you can well imagine. What gives this person the temerity to think my life is for hire. Is this taking things too far? When did I become a puppet?

But another part of me is up for a challenge. What do the good people here think?

Gay Kenyan Politician A Hoax

I confess to this story being a hoax. Thanks for those who commented, I hope you can forgive my little juvenile prank in the spirit of April Fools' day. I left a little clue for the hawkeyed in the label, 'swineflight'.

Of course I did not publish any comments for that post, just had a private chuckle. Love you all!

Kenyan politician in gay row

A senior politician in Kenya has left his wife of 20 years for a younger male lover – his official driver. It has been reported that the wife confronted the politician with explicit photographic evidence gleaned from hired private investigators following what the wife termed as prolonged denial of her conjugal rights. Sources have told the media that the man who has three adult children left his wife after last-ditch efforts to reconcile the pair collapsed when the politician refused to end the affair with the man.

Neighbours speaking on condition of anonymity, describe the politician as being overly friendly with their teenage sons, a matter causing speculation as to who else the politician might have ensnared. As Kenyan media went to press the politician was said to be holed in meetings at a city hotel with various supporters including church leaders. The whereabouts of the young man at the centre of the row remain unknown.

More to follow.